Ten years ago, my sister Sarah and I were hiding from the Authority. We were so against the cruel takeover tactics that they used. I felt so alone, my parents had sent us away so that we wouldn’t get kidnapped and I had not heard from them since. I knew deep down that they weren’t alive but the hope that I could maybe see them again someday kept me going. 

Sarah, my sister, was only 11 at the time and I was 17. The violent world we were in was all she knew and I would have done anything for her to have a better quality of life. No one should ever have to witness what she did in her 11 short years. 

Sarah was really struggling. She became really sick all of a sudden. She was so weak and pale and I couldn’t stand to see her like that. I did everything I could to help her – I gave her most of my food when we ate, I let her sleep using both our blankets to stop her shivering, but she continued to deteriorate. I knew that if Sarah did not get help, sooner or later, she would die. 

I felt as if I had no choice but to bring her to the hospital. However, the Authority ran the entire hospital so bringing her there inevitably meant losing her to the army and never seeing her again. I felt so awful. How could I not save her? What sort of person would I be if I set her up for life in the Authorities army that our parents sacrificed themselves to save us from?

Reluctantly, I made the decision to take her to the hospital. At least it would mean she could live, but I could never feel good about my choice. I picked up Sarah and walked with her lying almost limp in my arms towards the building. I was forced to leave her just outside, in the hope someone would find her and avoid me being taken as well. 

My heart was broken as I tried to say goodbye to her. I could hardly make a sentence through fits of tears. My poor sister was too weak to even say goodbye to me but managed what I perceived to be a reassuring smile, as if she knew. She must have been fearing her future with the Authority. 

I slipped away and tried not to be spotted by the Authority when leaving the grounds of the hospital. On my way back, I would take a glance backwards in my sister’s direction to see if she had been spotted by anyone yet. Finally, I saw her being taken into the building by some monsters from the Authority. It was arguably the most bittersweet moment of my life. I knew that my little sister would live to see another day and possibly even a life after the war, but I had just lost the only family I had left to the Authority. I remember feeling so lost, empty, distraught, and above all, angry. Angry that the Slash had to tear my life apart like this. At that moment, I knew the only place for me to go was the Resistance. 

Finally, ten years down the line and the war is over. The Resistance defeated the Authority and are now in power. I can’t say I have the happiest life as I am still recovering from the war but its getting better. I haven’t ever managed to shake this sickening feeling I got when I abandoned Sarah all those years ago. It still feels as if I have a pit in my stomach, but at least now with the war over and Authority defeated, I have just the smallest shred of hope that Sarah could be doing just fine and I could maybe find her again someday.